Our Coming Out Story
Coming out was an extremely difficult, life-changing moment for both of us. Everyone's stories are different and we all go through varying experiences that affect when and how we choose to come out. Nevertheless, it is important for us to share our story to help others struggling to find their truths and live authentically, and allow them to draw inspiration from our experiences to assist in their journey of internal freedom and acceptance. Many struggle to come out for a long period in their lives, while others never do, for their entire lives. Know, that you are not alone, and as difficult as it may seem, there is a bright light at the end of your coming out journey, and you will be better and stronger because of it.
Life In Your Truth and be Happy
For as long as we both have lived, as soon as we reached puberty, we both knew we were gay and how we felt and what attractions we had. The difficult part was accepting those feelings as our own and embracing them and living in those truths, happily. Many people choose to push those feelings aside, as we did, and try to live the traditional life, where a man and a woman fall in love, get married and have children. I think because we both wanted marriage and kids, we never felt that living as authentic gay men, we would be afforded those opportunities and fought long and hard to banish that perception of a life from our existence. Gay marriage wasn't a thing when we were coming out, and it only became a reality in 2015 so there weren't examples of gay couples we could look up to, that were public figures, that were married with children, until years later. One thing we do know is that living your life as a lie, takes a toll as it did for us, and led to depression, excessive drinking and partying, but at the end of the day, being alone, without love and acceptance for oneself, is taxing on the body and soul. There comes a time when you cannot live happily and there's only so much distraction one can partake in to fill those voids.
We both found our truths and acceptance in our middle-to-late twenties. That's how long it took for us dig deep within, and find our self-acceptance. No matter how long it takes, it's important that you never give up on yourself and find that happiness, and do whatever it takes to find it. One thing we learned through all this, is to never doubt your friendships and your family. True friends will be there for you and will accept you with open arms. Family will do the same! You are supported, you matter and you are loved! We thought our friends and families wouldn't accept us, and it was the complete inverse of that. There are cases where families don't accept you, but never let that impede on continuing your journey and finding what it is that makes you happy. Some friends are more than family and will be more than happy to take on that role as well. Just remember to take your time, and do so as feels right, at your own pace, and allow those you are opening up to, time to heal, to understand, and to accept, or not. Not everyone has to accept you, and that is ok too.
Coming out was the release of many years of depression and sadness and loneliness and from that day forward, there was nothing but happiness, because the world was ours to explore, gay and loud and proud! Living in your truth and authenticity is the ultimate satisfaction. Never let the fear of what others think, keep you from doing so! Be gay and be happy because your truth will set you free!
Resources for those wanting to come out
No matter how much we write about this topic, nothing seems better than seeing us discuss it, live and in person, with every emotion on our sleeves. Check out the video below and let us know what you think in the comments, and share your stories with us. Nothing beats the bond of greatness from being open and honest with yourself and sharing that with others. As always, thank you for the continued love and don't forget to like and subscribe, if you haven't already done so!